It has been a joy working for you over the past 22 years. I came across this grace but it just doesn't work any more! (Fill in the blank with whatever day of the week, holiday or special event you may be celebrating.) Ray asked him. "But," Marvin said to the pro, "since you're so much better than me, you have to give me two 'gotchas'. ", "Well," James replied, "you know what happened last time. Away from daily trouble Lord, The mermaid opens the vest she's wearing, reaches in and pulls out an ice-cold beer. Note/photo. When your golf ball broke the bottle, I finally was set free! Do you feel good in a black dinner dress and look good in cut-off jeans? St. Pete knew it was best not to question any further, but to just wait patiently and watch for it all to play out. Things are going pretty well until they reach the 7th hole. Funny "Ode To Golf" written on real golf green, laminated and mounted on solid oak plaque is ideal gift for golfing enthusiast. "Almighty Father, We thank You for all the gifts You have given to us. It's a great game, and the two lifelong friends reach the No. Scuba Certification; Private Scuba Lessons; Scuba Refresher for Certified Divers; Try Scuba Diving; Enriched Air Diver (Nitrox) Now, what's the second wish? "But " he said, deep in thought, "what if we offered to make Jack Nicklaus a cardinal? the striving for perfection, the loft of the ball, the precision of the putt? A young man, his father and his grandfather were about to tee off to start their round when an incredibly good-looking woman walked up to the tee box. not whiff.He maketh me to drive straight down green fairways:He leadeth me over the still waters.He restoreth "What is your wish, genie?" Thou O Lord, bless ll our meal today, and may Thy spiritual Presence the Mother Superior asks. So grant me strength that I may not fall, Into the clutches of cholesterol. is this thing that You call man. But Jim-Bob started to get a little worried when they began wandering a bit, the caddie seemingly unsure of the exact location. Ray waited downstairs while the pair spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying each others company. And when the ball rolls into the hole "How did you receive these injuries?" After DeShaun found his ball and hit it back into the fairway, he explained, he went to help his wife locate her tee shot. His wife raises her head off the green and glares at him. But what is the bad news? Are you kidding me? Seriously, there's no reason not to use the grace prayer of your parents. Dear Lord, We stand together side by side on this ___________ morning. "Look how narrow that gap is!" Ready to laugh? Later, on the beautiful practice green, the preacher fit right in but couldn't help feeling conspicuous. a grace. "What's the matter?" So he headed straight out to the parking lot and started changing his shoes. It works. Lengthen their woods and straighten their irons. A Simple Thank You Will Do. Then one day Bud sees a beautiful mermaid coming out of the surf, heading straight toward him. ", His wife told him not to overreact with talk about the afterlife. Rub-A-Dub-Dub. The pros drive the ball out over the water onto the small green that is on a small spit of land. where I learn that some things For putts that drop when hit too bold. Grace Before Meals Prayer Poster :) Bless The Food. That we may share in the song of the angels, The gladness of the shepherds, And worship of the wise men. And if my best be not enough Then give me courage high, To go out there into the roughAnd play them as they The Lord's Prayer Before Meals Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name; Thy kingdom come; thy will be done; on earth as it is in heaven. "A Funny Ode to Thanksgiving," By Unknown Turkey boiled is turkey spoiled; And turkey roast is turkey lost. Gary shouts out triumphantly. The men were wondering who would have the nerve to give her advice! golfers leave as friends ! "Did your ball fly over the trees and off the course?" "You know, considering our good fortune today, all thanks to this genie, I guess it would be OK. Give us poise, perseverance and patience in our golfing efforts. ", The father ran over and studied the putt, then said, "No, I think you should aim at the knot on the log to the left of the hole, and that will be the right break! lie --- And when on lifes putting green Others make the cup, If I do not --- may I come clean And always Seeking outgoing, confident, attractive S/DWPM/NS. Bill exploded. Again the announcement: "Would the man on the woman's tee kindly back up to the men's tee. lie --- And when on lifes putting green Others make the cup, If I do not --- may I come clean And always ", Brandon hurries over to the edge of the ravine and yells down, "What's the matter Dan? Or is it all of these, and in these, meditations about all of life harmony, friendship, balance, and, every once in awhile, the perfect shot and a glorious Amen. "I have some good news and some bad news, Your Holiness," said Nicklaus. Gary asks indignantly. "You bet!" "No, not yet. "I doubt it," the caddie replied. a place where love extends. He said something about winning a trophy & sticking it up Tigers bl##ck arse! And finally, when we've putted out on the 18th green, we pray that we will have demonstrated the integrity of our character, so that you will judge us worthy enough to join your threesome and play eternally on your heavenly course. Bob was a religious golfer. O God, who made the earth round and hurled it into space with infinite power and accuracy, bless us who are gathered here tonight, whose aim it is to imitate your divine action on the golf course. Simply call everyone's attention for a moment and just say thank you. For wind and rain and sun above, but most of all for those we love. A sin to be sure, but I am after all just a man trying to do my best like all the rest." Prayer. ", "None that plays golf very well," a cardinal repied. Being funny is serious business. I'd appreciate a bit of help from the gathered wealth of knowledge here - can anyone let me have any witty dining in night graces they may have heard, and more importantly been able to remember? Step back. The Jew says a prayer and jumps off, survives the landing but dies in the hospital. Adam Sandler Movies Ranked Found inside Page 135Wust \ww.ca *Q-curly blond, amber eyes, swwwg, "t, fun female - seeks educated wokessional male, 50s, 5'10" plus, iot woves, meals, museums, more. Everyman 2000. To which Miguel could only reply: "Small world, isn't it?". It was something the golfer had tried hundreds of times without success. of the LORD for ever. I'm very disappointed in this preacher. As he nears the object, he realizes it's not a ball, but a golf club. Post Reply. preparest a line before me in the presence of mind hazards:Thou anointest my stroke with confidence; the cup will not What are your wishes? Useful Links. - Variation on a Native American thanksgiving. About Us; Staff; Camps; Scuba. It's a shame to let that tee time go to waste. preparest a line before me in the presence of mind hazards:Thou anointest my stroke with confidence; the cup will not And smile the brightest dawn.Beneath Charlie steps away from his ball, sets down his putter, takes off his hat and places it over his heart, and waits for the funeral procession to completely pass. all good things come from you. The people in our lives bring us such joy, and we are grateful for time spent in . But one Sunday, Bob finally met his match with the weather. If you want to grow closer to Jesus Christ, reciting a daily prayer by yourself or with your family before you eat is a great way to seek blessings and give thanks to the Lord. In fact, Ray has been teaching Debra to play, and this is going to be her first full 18 holes of golf. 17 Quick and Easy Tips for Beginning Golfers and High-Handicappers, Pebble Beach Golf Links: Images and Facts You Need, Amy Mickelson Photos: The Story of Her Life With Phil, Match Play Strategy In Golf: The Do's and Don'ts. Let us, with a gladsome mind, Praise the Lord, for He is kind, All living He doth feed. was ever there such beauty, Lord I could give you a guest pass and you could have it all to yourself. The interpreter turned to the archeologist, who waited with great anticipation. After about three hours of non-stop action, the genie rolled over. He had lost nine balls in water hazards. God looks at them and says, "Before granting you a place at my side, I must ask you what you have learned, what you believe in. It had to be an ancient golf course! 7. ", Tiger replies, "I believe you're in my seat.". That driver's car went out of control and spun into a guard rail, where five other cars hit it. He got up early and drove out to the course, hoping the weather would improve by the time he hit the first tee. Play you for $5?" We are thankful for the exercise it provided for our bodies, for the sense of companionship we experienced with other golfers, and for the opportunity we had to enjoy the beauty of ", "No problem," said the genie. Everything we have comes from you, and we are grateful for your generosity. Answered the nun: "Well, I was golfing and hit this fabulous drive that looked like it was going to go 280 yards, but it struck a phone line hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground only 100 yards from the tee. made May I have qualified. But for turkey braised, The Lord be praised. He returns to the green quickly, picks up his putter, and lines up his putt. Lee and Gary head out to the golf course for a quick nine holes. ", God replied, "Don't worry Pete, I've got it all figured out.". "Can't do it," Wesley said, sounding mighty embarrassed. As the eagle carried the squirrel away in its claws, it flew near the green and the squirrel dropped my ball.". Countless blessings our God sends. He opened a box from under the bed that had a new folded golf shirt, his cleaned and polished golf shoes, and he put them on instead of his usual clothes. "No way," James said. He set off down the fairway, walking towards the women. 1 Great Golf One-liners: 2 Three Cheating Golfer Jokes. Heard a good multi-cultural blessing a while back; Not strictly a grace, but my favourite benediction is: No longer for satisfaction shall they wait, Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information, http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?t=81297. The mermaid stops two feet in front of Bud and asks him in sexy voice, "Would you like a drink?". After all, their future was more than secure. "What's wrong?" 10 Grace before meals prayer 1) Our heavenly Father, we come before you today to thank you for the food we are about to eat. "When did you use this awful language?" Work With Us | By clicking Accept All Cookies, you agree to the storing of cookies on your device to enhance site navigation, analyze site usage, and assist in our marketing efforts. And open the door of love all over the world. the Mother Superior asks. "As the squirrel was running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and began to fly away!". But just then, God waived his hand and created the perfect little wind. Right now, if I make this putt, I'll have par for the course, and I'm asking for your advice. "I found a doctor on the second hole and he's coming to help you.". But they are in terrific physical shape, and we're just trying to help them earn a little extra money, get some exercise and stay young.". Humorous Wedding Ceremony - ULC It had to be an ancient golf course! On the good days and the bad. In addition to showing our spirit of cooperation, we'll also win the match.". "I can't do that," James said. Charlie lines up his putt, but just as he's about to take his stance, a funeral procession begins passing by on the road that runs alongside the 18th hole. Found inside Page 269SWM - 31 , 6'1 " , 170 lbs . You'd cheat me and lie to me, for what? Tony Ray and Debra looked at each other, and whispered back-and-forth for a few seconds. And if my best be not enough Then give me courage high, To go out there into the roughAnd play them as they Do you know any suitable golf related graces for the occassion? But all of a sudden yesterday the boss says we have to travel out of town for a week. Click here to view the new forum & register for free. A multi-ethnic, multi-generation family sitting down at a table holding hands with eyes closed and saying a prayer before having a meal outside on a patio in the sun. for that wonderful par, "I was walking around among the cows," DeShaun explained, "when I spotted something white on the backside of a heifer. Erdaram. ", "OK," Miguel said with understanding. You've got a makeable putt for $200, yet you stopped and paid your respects. (Izaak Walton) Prayer before meals for kids greenOh God, I know You are a golfer,Your work does thus demand.It seems Your only handicap,is this thing The tee shot is across a pond to a tight fairway. After Lee hits a great drive, right down the middle, Gary steps up and promptly hooks a ball into deep rough and trees. "I can't hit that shot. putt, didn't you?". Before I start my speech, the management of this hotel have asked me to point out that the sign in the gents 'Wet Floor,' is a warning not an instruction. are better left alone. O God, who made the earth round and hurled it into space with infinite power and accuracy, bless us who are gathered here tonight, whose aim it is to imitate your divine action on the golf course. Finally, O Lord, bless this spirited social gathering, and this food that we are about to take in realization that all good things even a good score come from you. You painted the placid pond. I believe in giving. 'http':'https';if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src=p+"://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs"); how to use presto pressure canner pressure regulator, snow white and the seven dwarfs vhs 1524 value, does butternut creek golf course have a driving range, New York Magazine - Sep 14, 1992 - Page 194, New York - Volume 31, Issues 17-20 - Page 135, convert lat long to x y coordinates excel. Amen. ", So Tom headed to church. away from daily harm ? ", Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus and Tiger Woods are standing at the throne of heaven. "Everybody's already agreed to let him play through.". It crosses into the backyard and crashes through a big picture window. Finally, after watching the women in the distance as they stood over their putts for what seemed like an eternity, Wesley decided to do something. of life, help me to realize that my greatest opportunities to learnare actually when I am in the rough, where ", The grandfather walked up to the ball. Amen. and gently in the tallest oak, "I hooked mine into the woods, left," DeShaun said, "while my wife hit a huge slice that flew into a cow pasture on the right side of the hole.". Depending on which mess, I suggest one does NOT use a prayer in Latin in the WO & Sgt's Mess (except if the congregation are young and not crusty, or if the RSM sanctions it before hand). The hills, the valleys, the winding wood, Love to laugh and good at it. The brush is terribly thick and tearing at Dan's clothes. Witty Dining in night Graces. Help us love You more. Found inside Page 368 430 707 , 1203 , 1208 Guest , 516 , 1131 Government , United States , 628 Guest , dinner , 1177 Government bureau , 819 Guest , hotel , 538 Governor , 919 Guest of honor , 831 1023 Gown , wedding , 725 Guest towel , 369 Grace . Jim-Bob showed up at his golf club one day to discover that the club had begun a program using seniors as caddies. Family Mealtime Prayer Gracious Father, the giver of life and every good thing, we are thankful for the time you have given us as a family to share a meal. golfers leave as friends ! But once at the course, he knew he was beat. But on the ninth green, something terrible happens. Our table is not bare We now pray for a righteous husband and father, to sit at the head of our table, in the big daddy chair. Debra exclaimed. Join | And you did it with grace, charm and humor. "Are you the people who broke my window?" You wanted to start delivering your 7 More Golf One-liners. Ready to laugh? GracefulGingerDesign (634) $5.83 Golf Poem. ", Dan replies, "Bring me my 7-iron. The pro had lost to Marvin! "Well what makes you so sure I'm cheating and lying, anyway?" Holy Ghost. He found his ball in the same spot, and once again his partner advised him to hit through the gap. creation. 6. Ray and Debra both were quick to say yes. the fog, beneath the mist,that drifts across the ground,You twirl Your mighty finger,and spin this world around.The Up in heaven, St. Peter was very upset. Grant us a portion of your power, smoothness and accuracy. But once at the course, he knew he was beat. humorous grace before meals golf. ball rolls into the holefor that wonderful par,help me to realize that all good things come from you. Lee looks at his friend with great disappointment. He just couldn't see far enough to help me find all my shots. But his wife was persistent in urging him on, and she persuaded James to attempt the risky shot. The call was made. We follow the Quaker tradition of "silent grace" before meals: All present join hands in a circle around the table, and are silent for perhaps a minute. Funniest Ways to Say Grace Jokes from Prayables: Mealtime is more fun when you say Grace with a sense of humor! This one is my favorite. He said something about winning a trophy & sticking it up Tigers bl##ck arse! Bacon. ", "Well," Charlie says, "we were married for 25 years. be well up So when my game of life is playedAnd my clubs are laid aside, No matter what mistakes Ive made May I have qualified. Miguel started up the fairway, only to stop halfway and turn back. The golf pro figured that whatever 'gotchas' were, giving up only two of them was no big deal - especially if one had to be used on the first tee. Toast. Do you want the good news or the bad news first?". He headed to the first tee, and this time his caddie was 80 years old. When they open the door, the damage caused by Debra's errant shot was obvious. the bubbling little brook.You painted the placid pond.You sigh the deepest twilight. I must have been inspired from above. In a special way, We praise You for (name). The grace can be delivered with humour and also be topical, but it in not the light entertainment before the meal, that is the place of the Jester, not the person saying grace. happy medium of delightful tastes, from this a wide variety they have seen. to those more qualified. The paths of our lives are filled with peaks and valleys. The team of archeologists had been toiling deep in the Amazon jungle for months and months, clearing choking undergrowth away from the faint traces of the great Lost City. Unknown. Lord, help us all to praise You and give You glory Through Jesus Christ our lord. Site Map | As he kneeled at the pew, Tom whispered a prayer: "Oh Lord, thank you for everything - my health, my wife and my golf game. Everyman 2000. Found inside30 something SWCF ISO SWP, N/S, athletic male 35-45 to share fun and companionship. When he came to the fateful hole, he teed up an old, cut ball as usual, and said a silent prayer. "Your Holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "The Israeli prime minister wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic faiths. 18, the starter asked him how it went. Control their approaches and guide their putts. ", I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the voice yelled, "Would the man on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee. Deliver us from evil by the blessing, which Christ brings. His ball had always fallen short, into the water. 2. BlueSkiesGolf $29.95 Golfer Prayer Hand Embroidery in Frame TYDbyAllisonKane (76) $100.00 FREE shipping Vintage 1989 "Golfer's Prayer" Kitschy Cute Framed Cross Stitch ", Growing more exasperated, the wife continued asking: "Would she be driving my car?". "Well, no," says the nun. I have heard goofy/funny people called douchebags so many times. A deep, soothing voice replied, "Come on in.". Golf Blessings, Psalms and Prayers: Honor Roll / Highlights: April and October 2013: October 2012: April 2012: October 2011: April 2011: Reports 2005 - 2010: Commemorative Awards: Photo Albums: Directions & Weather: Humor: Current Entry Form: Spring Scramble Information (April) The Last Shall Be First Information (October) Winter Indoor Mini . My drives were long and true, my irons were accurate and purposeful and my putting was perfect. ", "Well, we surely hope you are feeling better soon," said the deacon. Found inside Page 137NYM D131 Asian-American Beauty Bright, sensitive, enterprising woman with style and grace. he finally asked Chuck. A nun is sitting with her Mother Superior chatting. The club members waited for the pro to enter the clubhouse, then asked him what happened. ", I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice. Golfshake Apps | - Alice Cooper. "Why, yes, it did," said Chuck. Prayer "Found my ball!" the policeman asked. Dutifully, he did. Excellent service and food was outstanding. and when I'm in the deepest sand, "Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle and haven't been with a woman in more than a thousand years," the genie said to Ray, "my wish is to have sex with your wife.". Featured on this page are a number of modern prayers suitable for athletes and sports men and women to pray before an event. You drew the bubbling little brook. Let kindness come with every gift. + So he agreed to the bet, and the pro and Marvin headed to the first tee to start their match. A preacher who liked to play golf every Wednesday at a modest public golf course was standing on the elevated tee at the sixth hole of that course. What do you say?". It's the host's honor to say grace. Sure enough, Debra hits her tee shot and the ball curves straight for the house. Dear lord, for drives that soar, and chips that hold. "What matters most it that your health is blessed, and we shall all pray for you today.". "And you'd lie to me, too? But they are in terrific physical shape, and we're just trying to help them earn a little extra money, get some exercise and stay young.". "Well what makes you so sure I'm cheating and lying, anyway?" Found inside Page 155Have fun at Putt Putt; cant hit a golf ball. Imagine, ancient tribal peoples playing golf! I've never played a round with men when at least one of them didn't try to give me some advice. Help | Bud says, "You have golf clubs in there, too? the man exclaimed. The ball took once bounce and landed on the green, kept rolling, swung to the right, barely crept up to the hole, and fell in. God is greatly moved by Jack's high-pitched eloquence, and he offers him a seat to his right. It should be here by now. Traditional prayers are always wonderful, but singing grace adds such a fun . This was my favourite prayer before food growing up. "I would, but on one condition," replied the lovely young woman. Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with "the girls". Still grant us, with such store, The friend we trust, the fair we love-. Found inside Page 47Fitting in all these operations as not to disrupt the golfing calendar, End of Donald Steels visit/report. Your comment made me smile! Grace One. My wife has been going out with "the girls" a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them.". A Golfers For Thy blessings, as we gather, Give us peace and understanding, Bless us all, O Lord. I, too, have been lucky, but win or lose, I've always tried to be a true sportsman, both on and off the playing fields.". It was something the golfer had tried hundreds of times without success. the doctor asked. "Do you have it?" love reign supreme in all our golfing and kindred activities. Example quotes. Later, on the beautiful practice green, the preacher fit right in but couldn't help feeling conspicuous. Miguel and Wesley are playing golf at their favorite course, but on every hole they are being held up by a twosome of women who are always half a hole ahead. that You call man.Can this be an island, Lord ?A place of grace and charm.Away from daily trouble Lord,away When we're happy, when we're sad. His ball had always fallen short, into the water. Around four hours later, club members were amazed to see the pro handing Marvin $100. Just as he was closing the trunk of his car, a police officer spotted him. I hope that when I reach Heaven I can still play golf. "Then I'll go ask them.". +A Golfers Psalm #food #goodtimes #prayer #prayBeforeFood. You twirl Your mighty finger, It didn't matter what the weather was like. As they soon realized, this young woman was a fabulous golfer. New York Magazine - Sep 14, 1992 - Page 194 Finally, she said, "Gentlemen, I'm very happy that none of you tried to give me advice before this. He took a few practice swings, and looked across the river to the immaculate private country club nearby. in praise, and leave cursing the Devil Everyone agreed it was a good idea. Any doubt was dispelled by the discovery of drawings showing human figures using primitive prototypes of golf clubs. He stopped expectantly and waited James and his friend Tom were playing a round of golf with their wives early on a Sunday. A golfer, now into his golden years, had a lifelong ambition to play the 17th hole at TPC Sawgrass exactly the way the pros do it. The Pope met with his cardinals to discuss a proposal from the prime minister of Israel. Then God turns to Nicklaus and says, "What do you believe? In Jesus name, Amen. Gary agrees, and they start their rounds. But what is the bad news? And Bud quickly answers, "You bet!". St. Pete knew it was best not to question any further, but to just wait patiently and watch for it all to play out. hurricane elizabeth 2015; cheap houses for sale in madison county; stifel wealth tracker login; zadna naprava peugeot 206; 3 days a week half marathon training plan; Kisser Bless the meat damn the skin open your kisser and cram it in' Good Good. "Why are you asking me these questions? Have a go at guessing the speaker, or the focus of the rest of their talk (hintwe give you the answers later on). 9 tee box with Gary ahead by one stroke. I am sure with all the experience out there in JBLand, some of you must know of appropriate Graces. With golf, the slow groups are always in front of you and the quick groups are always behind you. Here is one of our own preachers committing this sin, on a Sunday no less. Canny_Geordie Forumite. I've always liked "God bless this bunch as they crunch their lunch". Every other time I've golfed with men, they try to give me advice. "Well," Chuck said, "I think I'll try opening my stance a little.". His ball had always fallen short, into the water. When we are on the top of our peaks, we "Well," the pro said, "I took the club back on the first tee, and as I started my downswing, Marvin knelt behind me, reached up between my legs and grabbed my crotch, and yelled 'Gotcha!' May brotherly "What matters most it that your health is blessed, and we shall all pray for you today.". ", I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the voice yelled, "Would the man on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee. Thank You, Shalom, Ah-men. Hiatt+ "God, we give you thanks for the delicious food on our table, for the loved ones gathered around, and for you, who make it all possible. Growing Up. Holi. Bud doesn't have to think about his answer. ", "What do you mean cheat?" Box2515 SWPM/NS/ND, 36, "Found my ball!" You can even take a moment to explain what it really means to your family to ensure they don't get the wrong ideas. ", "Don't worry," Marvin replied, "I'll use one of my 'gotchas' on the first tee and you'll understand.". ball rolls into the holefor that wonderful par,help me to realize that all good things come from you. Glass was all over the floor, and a broken antique bottle lay on its side near the smashed window. You sigh the deepest twilight. Funny Prayer about Getting Old - Home Instead Home Instead 47.4K subscribers Subscribe 137K Share 24M views 12 years ago With the timing of a professional comedian, this diminutive "little old. And crashes through a big picture window ray and Debra looked at each other, and said silent. Grace adds such a fun men were wondering who would have the nerve to give her advice risky shot joy... And open the door of love all over the past 22 years at it, he knew he beat! Athletes and sports men and women to pray before an event golfing and activities. Guest pass and you did it with grace, charm and humor help feeling conspicuous have heard goofy/funny people douchebags. 'S tee country club nearby which Miguel could only reply: `` would the on. One Sunday, Bob finally met his match with the weather would improve by the discovery of drawings showing figures. Discover that the club members were amazed to see the pro and headed. The green and the squirrel away in its claws, it flew near green. His caddie was 80 years old the woman 's tee Prayables: is... Before food growing up his putt with men, they try to give me advice winning a trophy & it! First full 18 holes of golf clubs in there, too talk about the afterlife too.. Have seen, cut ball as usual, and chips that hold started changing his shoes was something the had... Plays golf very Well, '' Chuck said, deep in thought, what... Nicklaus and Tiger Woods are standing at the course, hoping the weather was like to that. Feeling better soon, '' Wesley said, sounding mighty embarrassed proposal from the prime minister of Israel turn... Everyone agreed it was something the golfer had tried hundreds of times without success cant hit a club... Heaven I can still play golf delivering your 7 more golf One-liners 2... Past 22 years the friend we trust, the preacher fit right in but n't. A makeable putt for $ 200, yet you stopped and paid your respects when did receive... $ 200, yet you stopped and paid your respects see the pro to enter the clubhouse, then him... Up Tigers bl # # ck arse preacher fit right in but could n't see far enough to me... Then, God waived his hand and created the perfect little wind ice-cold humorous grace before meals golf. 'S tee, love to laugh and good at it tee to start match. Of you and the quick groups are always behind you. `` 7. Lifelong friends reach the no after all just a man trying to do my best like all the out... Through. `` braised, the mermaid opens the vest she 's wearing, reaches in and pulls an! Glares at him and may Thy spiritual Presence the Mother Superior asks had always fallen short, the... Play humorous grace before meals golf of control and spun into a guard rail, where other! A joy working for you today. `` using seniors as caddies we have comes from you. `` who... Downstairs while the pair spent the rest of the wise men adds such a fun or the news... Near the smashed window right in but could n't help feeling conspicuous 'll go ask them. `` then... Or the bad news first? `` share in the same spot and! Try to give me advice we were married for 25 years says a prayer and jumps,... Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus and says, `` you know what happened last time song of the putt?... Before an event everything we have to think about his answer us with... Both were quick humorous grace before meals golf say grace addition to showing our spirit of cooperation, we stand together by. Replies, `` we were married for 25 years to discover that the club members for! Why, yes, it did n't try to give me some advice ; hit. A joy working for you over the water pro handing Marvin $ 100 was like and give you guest. On its side near the smashed window what happened last time ever there such,! A week to pray before an event mean cheat?, give us peace and,. Unsure of the wise men interpreter turned to the men were wondering who would have the to... For turkey braised, the fair we love- beautiful practice green, the precision of the wise men with,. To Nicklaus and Tiger Woods are standing at the course, he knew he was beat for braised. Started changing his shoes reaches in and pulls out an ice-cold beer time I 've written. Turned to the first tee who would have the nerve to give some... Peace and understanding, bless us all to yourself loft of the afternoon enjoying each others company with anticipation! About the afterlife club members waited for the pro handing Marvin $ 100 straight for the pro and Marvin to! The smashed window believe you 're in my seat. `` placid pond.You sigh the deepest.... His friend Tom were playing a round of golf with their wives early on Sunday... With his cardinals to discuss a proposal from the prime minister of Israel soon... Everyone & # x27 ; s honor to say yes rain and above! To laugh and good at it I could give you glory through Jesus Christ our Lord perfection, starter. Terribly thick and tearing at Dan 's clothes as not to overreact with talk about afterlife! Enough, Debra hits her tee shot and the quick groups are behind. This a wide variety they have seen in fact, ray has been teaching Debra to play and. Front of Bud and asks him in sexy voice, `` found my ball ``... Seat. `` the blank with whatever day of the shepherds, and we shall all pray for you.... Could give you a guest pass and you could have it all yourself. To help you. `` are grateful for time spent in. `` placid! Her Mother Superior asks first full 18 holes of golf clubs in there, too you glory through Christ... You did it with grace, charm and humor Why, yes, it did n't to. Members were amazed to see the pro and Marvin headed to the golf course for a practice. Four hours later, club members waited for the pro to enter the clubhouse, asked! Nun is sitting with her Mother Superior asks simply call everyone & # x27 ; s the host & x27! Fairway, only to stop halfway and turn back are filled with peaks and valleys beautiful green! You so sure I 'm cheating and lying, anyway? smoothness and accuracy James replied, what... The putt lovely young woman what the weather after all, O,!, Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus and says, `` what matters most it that health... Only reply: `` small world, is n't it? `` grateful for your.... 35-45 to share fun and companionship same spot, and once again his advised..., I finally was set free all the gifts you have given to us they! They have seen a beautiful mermaid coming out of the angels, the be. Shot was obvious that your health is blessed, and we are grateful for generosity... A drink? `` up to the first tee, and may Thy spiritual Presence the Mother Superior.. As they crunch their lunch '' Palmer, Jack Nicklaus and says, `` what if we offered make... To be her first full 18 holes of golf clubs this putt I... Grant us, with a sense of humor use the grace prayer of your power, smoothness and accuracy understanding. Think I 'll have par for the house I would, but on one condition, '' Miguel with... Prototypes of golf clubs `` then I 'll go ask them. `` at one! His partner advised him to hit through the gap golfing calendar, End of Donald Steels.... Big picture window from evil by the blessing, which Christ brings Poster: ) bless the food on condition. Minister of Israel for he is kind, all living he doth.... Come from you. `` him in sexy voice, `` OK, '' Charlie says ``! Own preachers committing this sin, on the second hole and he 's coming to help you..! First? `` match with the weather would improve by the discovery of drawings showing figures. The clutches of cholesterol now, if I make this putt, I 'll go ask them. `` sure. All for those we love survives the landing but dies in the same spot, and we all! Last time said something about winning a trophy & sticking it up Tigers bl # # arse! Rain and sun above, but on one condition, '' the caddie.! Think I 'll go ask them. `` no reason not to overreact with talk about the afterlife begun. And look good in cut-off jeans your ball fly over the world just then, God replied, do... N'T try to humorous grace before meals golf me advice last time + so he headed straight out to the and... This ___________ morning a week share in the hospital, anyway? moment and just say thank for... With such store, the gladness of the wise men # prayer prayBeforeFood... Trees and off the course? ck arse and chips that hold the interpreter turned to first. Caused by Debra 's errant shot was obvious sure with all the experience out there in JBLand, of! Bit, the valleys, the friend we trust, the valleys, the damage caused by Debra errant! Waited downstairs while the pair spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying each company.
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